Lunch with Ry... #LoRy

Ok so last week I left off with Ry and I leaving the pet store with yum, yums in hand & of course Ry flipping out because I have "snakes in the purse." Now off to a new adventure. 

Lunch with Ry.

Sitting in the car in front of the pet store I watch Ry out of the corner of my eye. The mice happily run around the carrier on the floor. The lowered window lets in a nice cool breeze on this sunny day.

R: -bobs in the drivers seat- We need to think about catering!

L: You just now think of this? Really. Dude you're so behind.

R: -he looks at me- You didn't?

L: -smugness- Already started calling Mexican and Italian places. Whichever gives us the better price well then there you have it!

R: OMG that is so why you're my maid of horror!! -he damn near crushes me with a hug-

L: Dude it's maid of honor. 

R: No, no, -he waggles a finger at me- maid of horror because I refuse to be a bridezilla and you know I like hate conflict and am a total push over so yooou have to be my maid of horror and be absolutely horrid on my behalf because I just can't do it and you know this Sweetie I'm seriously we've known each other for about ever now so how on earth can you not know this I mean honestly it's maid of horror end of discussion. 

L: Dude you that was the longest sentence ever.

R: -takes a deep breath- YES!

L: You're such a freak. -I cross my arms in a huff, apparently I'm a Maid of Horror-

R: -hands on wheel, looking deep in thought- Chick Fil A!!!

L: O.x Huh? You want Chick Fil A at your wedding? Dude that's so cheap.

R: No bitch lunch! Let's go!

L: o.o whatever...

About fifteen minutes later we found ourselves almost to the window in the drive through. During the process of ordering and then the waiting I told Ry that a friend on Twitter told me that Chick Fil A donates to ANTI GBLT Youth Organizations.

Oh you should have seen his face. Definition of mischief.

He says nothing until we're at the window.

A young man holding a water bottle tells us the total. 

R: -hands over the money looking at his water bottle- Sweetie!! Do you remember what happened the last time I had a water bottle?

The guy is obviously listening.

L: Nope.

R: Sweetie I called you! Remember I froze it then cut the bottle away and then used it as a dildo! Don't you remember? Rick and J absolutely L.O.V.E.D. it.

L: Oh yea now I remember...

The guy looks at his water bottle for about two seconds before he throws it away. I snicker. Ry smiles.

This time a girl comes over to hand us our food. 

L: Hun get me a yogurt with granola after the pet store incident and whatever else you have planned for me to today I deserve yogurt and granola. 

R: Yes, Sweetie. -he turns to the girl in the window- Excuse me honeybee but I need a yogurt with granola.

L: WITH AN EXTRA PACK OF GRANOLA!

The poor thing looks frightened. She scurries off to quickly get a yogurt. 

While she's gone she leaves the drive through window open (they're not supposed to do that) which proves to be a mistake. I don't know about Chick Fil A where you are (or if you even have any) but the food chain around here is big and I mean HUGE so there's a ton of people in the back readying food and the like.

R: Sweetie!! OMG we so have to go to the sex store! OMG we gotta go! Especially since you have snakes in your purse!! Yes we must go! There's just to much pun not to go! Oh my goodness now that I think about it I need more lube.

L: Holy fuck dude we just bought a gianormous bottle like a week ago.

R: O.O Sweetie, there are three, very horny, ass loving men in my house. 

L: Good point. Good Point.

R: I know that bottle lasted about two days... I think. Oh hell I don't know! That reminds me... I also need penis candies! Those things are good.

I just so happen to look inside. The girl is frozen holding my yogurt with an extra pack of granola. The whole kitchen staff behind her is either staring at us with their mouths open or trying to blatantly ignore us by focusing on their job. Their covert glances at us told me that they fail. Epic fail.

R: Honeybee -he snaps his fingers- can we get that? Others behind us are becoming angry.

The poor girl blinks a few times at us before handing over my yogurt. Ry the asshole takes the lid off. Dips in his finger coating the tip thoroughly before suggestively licking it off.

R: Oh that is so much better than cum. -he hands the girl three dollars and me my yogurt and drives off-

L: -dips finger- Hey you're right. So much better than spunk.

and that my lovely LoRy fans is lunch with Ry.

...Next Week...

...Tuxedo Fittings...